I'm 17

So my birthday was a couple of days ago. I guess I feel 17! I always thought 17-year-olds were old and wise and mature. Uhh. Maybe a few. I don't know very many and I myself am definitely not one of them. It's pretty fun to be this age, though, and very exciting. One more year of school and then I'm an adult. I feel my childhood slipping away.... in some ways anyway!

On the morning of my birthday, I lay in my bed for a while and listened to the birds singing. Then I got out of my bed and went up stairs, half asleep. My mom and sister rushed towards me and said,“Happy birthday Esther! Now go take your pajamas off and put on some jeans and a t-shirt! Hurry up!” So, dazed, I changed and they took me to the car. They said we were making three stops. We first went to the bakery where we picked up Ladysmith's very yummy cinnamon buns, then to the coffee shop, then to Transfer Beach. We sat in a beautiful little spot overlooking the water and ate our breakfast. The ocean sparkled. The sun was shining, the sky was blue. Now if that isn't a special beginning to a birthday, what is?

I am really quite nervous right now. My biology provincial exam is in two days. I tried to bribe my parents into letting me take the exam next January instead, but they wisely pointed out to me that it's not a good idea to get into that kind of habit, and it's good to just study hard and get it over with instead of procrastinating about it. Procrastinating is so easy. I hate it, since I'm very often guilty of it. It doesn't bring satisfaction but it definitely brings stress, uneasiness, guilt, and bad marks. Ahhhhhhhhhh. I plan to avoid it as much as possible in the future and in the present too, of course. Just a thought- a lot of people like to talk about fixing things in their life in the future. I don't agree with this, I think if people want to fix things, whether it be a reoccuring sin, a bad habit, etc, they need to start now. Not later. Or it's probably not going to happen. The motto “work then play” is what I want to follow in life! It makes life so much more relaxing and rewarding in my opinion. Not to say that I always follow that (ahh). But I wish I did and I'm working on it. Laziness is one of the deadly sins. Now I don't mean to say that relaxing is bad. If you think that's what I meant, you've got it all wrong. I love relaxing. Haha.

I forgot to mention that Father's Day was a little while ago. I just want to say that I have a very wonderful dad whom I love very, very much. For countless reasons such as going to rivers and swimming in the summer with me, teaching me math and sciences, playing games, teaching me soccer, disciplining me, listening to me.... however, most importantly, he is starting me off on my faith journey in a very concrete and beautiful way. He lovingly teaches and guides me as I strive to follow and love Christ with my whole heart. There is nothing a dad could do that is more important than that!

Happiness

In the midst of studying and freaking out about provincial exams, I have to say I am terribly happy. On my breaks, I like to read little sections in random books, jump on the trampoline, run around re-arranging my room while listening to good music really loudly, talk about all sorts of things with my mom and sister, watch sections of the special video my dad is making of our trip-- it's the life. I am so happy. I told my mom the other day that I often feel too blessed.. there are so many who suffer in this world. She told me though, that I will most-likely suffer in the future.. and I should enjoy the minimal amount of suffering I have while it lasts.. even St Pio said that. It also means however that I need to give myself to the needs of others who suffer because that will bring me true happiness.... Okay. Cool. I need to do that much more. It's easier for me to say that than actually do it. I need to put all my words in action more! And if I have to suffer greatly one day, I sure hope I have enough courage and inner faith, hope, and love for God to embrace my suffering and offer it up for others. All in the attitude. I think that some kinds of suffering are not even suffering really, with the right attitude. That might sound weird but let me explain. When I am feeling sick, am worrying too much, feeling hurt, or am in a lot of pain, I try to remember how Jesus suffered so much on the cross. It makes the feeling of suffering go way down until in a way, it's not really suffering anymore. Although it's not like I have a lot of experience at all with the subject so some might say I don't really have a right to say that.

Cooking

I did some cooking today as good friends came over for the hockey game and my parents were gone for the day. I made spaghetti sauce, a gourmet type that you put through an old-fashioned strainer after simmering. It turned out really quite tasty and was fun to make. I also made guacamole dip, and brownies for dessert to put in icecream sundaes. Our friends brought greek salad and salmon. Quite the mixture of foods! Good thing the Canucks won or the sundaes wouldn't have tasted so good.
Cooking is fun, but it always takes longer than I think.

Two. More. Weeks.

.......of school! Come on Essy I Can Do This!!!!!! I'm behind in some areas sadly but I shall not lose hope!! I had a hot then freezing cold shower to wake myself up this morning. And made myself a mocha drink. Now I'm really whizzing. Well, I'm trying to, at least. (Bangs head on desk and stares into space, dreaming about summer, for a moment or two.)

Last Sunday we went to the lake for the first time this year! I was just going to sun bathe as the water was freezing. But apparently I had to water bathe. (wait, what?) Some people, won't mention any names, made me go swimming.  In fact, they threatened me. One of them is almost as strong as me and the other is stronger and taller. What could I do? So I spent 5 minutes inching into the water and went up to my neck.

I have a little book called "Have a Good Day" that contains a quote for every day of the year from the writings of St Padre Pio.  Each day it's awesome and inspiring. Today's quote:
"Do not be at all surprised at your weakness, but acknowledge what you are, and blush at your infidelity towards God, then confide in Him and abandon yourself tranquilly in the arms of the Heavenly Father, like a child in the arms of its mother."